Kinda messy as like my hair.

hair is getting longer and out of style.

it make me look so auntie and ugly.i can't tolerate with messy hair already!

i wanna cut it before posting by this week!

it's monday tmrw,blue+exam mode is on.

luckily nandos is waiting for me on tuesday and i gonna to be squeeze out their whole extra hot peri-peri sauce.haha.

i want shopping,movie,delicious food and more private(means not occupied for exam or other meaningless activities) in this week.and also the following April.haha

took nap but still feel sleepy.

and just finished up my crispy dove chocolate bar.fatty me again.

Oh yea,me had a nice and pleasant sunday today!

gonna hide in my blanket and pillowSS soon.

Goodnight,readers!

A sweet dessert

Hee,this is not my first time share this unique website,but recently i just can't control myself to play it since i need something to pass time.you know what,i know this game when i was only 14. my ex-roomate introduced it to me:)

Ferryhalim is having a collection of flash game with cute and nice design,soothing and pleasant background music.the games are not difficult to play and you definitely will love it.out of so many games,my favourite is always the Winterbells,and it also the most popular among the games.and follow for my Bumble Bee and Pocketful of Stars,and many many!you should try all and tell me do you love winterbell most,haha.

this is after finish loading.

and this is the tutorial.

see the birdie there?it will help you to double your marks!

Bumble Bee,catch the bee with bubbles!

and here are some photo from internet:)

I hope you enjoy with it,so do i.<3

so i'm con't with my jumping bunny again.haha.

i wanna break shuzhen's record!!

I do need some peace.

Thank god it's weekend.

and finally today i managed to take photo with my dusty camera.exam and stress make me no time to keep memories with it.and she crying over there because of my ignorance.

"historical"place(ss15,subang jaya)

 may bring you something wonderful and perfect,

like 100% pan mee in my heart.

It  make me laugh.

remind me there are many things still worth to treasure.

let go those sadness and start a new life.

because i should love myself more.

愛你的心永不變♥

I heart you:)

Fatty diary.

Oh,do you like big breakfast?haha.

I think you heard the news from Mcdonald that they are giving out the coupon(they do accept black and white printing),you can get two set of big breakfast for free when you spend rm5 and above,the promotion is still on going till 31 March:)

This is my lunch for today,hmm hmm,not only one,i get myself two set and it make me kinda disgustful.*puke.haha.the muffin is like rubber,the sausage is acceptable,the egg will be nicer if served when still warm.haha.initially i thought me myself can finish two set since i'm so starve like a wolf.and i start feel vomiting halfway already.and shuwei is "chopping" the scrambled eggs with her fork and act puking on it.see how grossly the breakfast is.

actually it's not that bad.maybe we bought it before 11 and only had it during lunch time.they are "cool-ed" under the aircond,that's why so yucky.i think i'll stop having it,but there still a voucher sleeping inside my wallet.wondering how should i do.hee.

me so unhealthy this two days.sigh.yesterday i had subway for my lunch and Mcd set for my dinner,fingers for snack and again Mcd for lunch today.fastfood is causing me fatter faster!!so i'll stay away from fast food from now.instead,i have almost consume 6 eggs within 12 hours.I'm stick with high cholesterol,high protein and high calorie now.

What should i eat during dinner time later?instant noodle maybe.another way to die faster.




Going to prepare my paediatric exam!
and i'm having another bright day today:D

March,with laugh and tears.

Hey,March is gonna end in two weeks time soon.Time is passing fast and I'm getting older.

Actually,I'm not really doing well in this month.life is getting harder and i have to describe as the life is killing me!!I'm always those emo people,write emo sentence,face also let people thought i'm diagnosed cancer-going to die soon.*touch wood touch wood.my emo cause lots of problem to me,and i always feel so sorry to my friends. they have to be my side when i'm down.

but to who people who reading this,don't you tortured by life too?friends,studies,course,posting,family,hostel,money,meals...*sigh.

whatever,my mood is superb nice now,so i'm not going to touch any unpleasant incident/maybe accidents which happenning recently.heeee:)

First,after waiting for so long,i finally bought a new laptop for myself!I'm not here to show off because i would like to share my happiness with you<3.i'm really happy to have mad in love my Apple Macbook Pro:)thanks mom and dad and me myself,haha!now there are another deleted item in my wishlist,so i'm gonna grab the rest asap.how greedy am i.

Till now,i'm so enjoy with capture the funny photo by using Photo booth.everytime looking back those ugly photos i'll laugh till die!!I share some with you.haha

Obese Me@Empire.

Fool me and sz in art/

 Alien me and lingling,haha.

i love this na!!

my youngest brother,huuuu!

Another thing and also the most important one,i got my Stefanie Sun's latest album too!initially i thought she wont release it in M'sia since we can't find in market on 8th Mac.somehow after days we bought it at popular bookstore with member's price,somemore there are free gift available too!oh my gosh,i'm fainted soon!haha!

It's the time to love you!!

I get my 21st birthday gift(still early i know,i'm july babe!)from my parents.

it's a must gift when you're 21,i know you know what is that.a key necklace.haha.

it means a lot to me anyway.i love it and sure i'll wear it to anywhere and anytime because it's a precious gift from my beloved parents.i always put them in first position,and i appreciate them to love me,protect me till today.if can,i wish to be their daughter again in next life...

So,it's still another month filled with happiness.

Be happier.to me and my friends..

When you smile..

懷念很久以前那個甚麼都不懂的我們。

笑得很燦爛很美麗。

小時候覺得幸福很簡單，長大了才發現簡單就是幸福。

繪圖：可愛的日本女生－maisa:)

OH,it's monday soon!

Haha,scary photo for you at midnight~

Initially i wanna hide in my room to study,since i'm not really put effort for this bones subject.and so accidentally i feel like on my lappie and surf net.and so another accidentally i'm doing mask and i capture a photo for myself!haha!forgive me that i'm so errrr.XD.

i have to pamper myself with delicious meal tmrw since i'm so stress.i'm facing 6 exams in this March.actually i don't mind to sit in the exam hall but why all the exams don't finish in few days time like how we do in summative.haih.after i finish my Orthopedic tmrw,i have to suffer till Friday and sit for my Community Healh Nursing.and then the Urology is waving hand to me on next monday again.ish.

My bu-tt is so impatient to stay in hostel anymore.i need someone bring me out for fresh air to energize me.;)

oh ya,if YOU are reading this.(i think most probably no,hee).i have to tell you I'm a Tao-ist/maybe Buddhist,of course i'm never discriminate other people's religion and i understand your job and purpose.It's just because i'm not really interest with it.and your visit is causing a big disturbance to me and my friends.hmm..and i pray to my dua pek gong or guang ying ma i'll not meet you anymore.

Fine.i have to con't my night with fracture bones and how to be a good nurse now.
Good night,readers!I love you.:)

Johnny Depp is Rango!

Just watched this "Rango"with Alice this Friday.hmm,actually i have no idea why i wanna watch this movie.maybe this poster caught my eyes and i think it will be another nice movie:) or maybe too stress due the exam so i need to get some fresh air.not really that bad but not that nice like how i imagined.this movie is trying to express something,and not-that-intelligent me can't get the meaning.haha.i think it try to tell you to find the true you.

Monday is having Orthopedic formative exam,and i feel so stress.notes is as thick as the french toast and the words inside it are so malnutrition.traction,fracture,fixation,TKR,bandage...hmm,so wanted to bandage myself now.zzzz.

Hmm,another malnutrition posts.enjoy your last 45mins weekend peeps.i love you!

who are you?

孫燕姿－當冬夜漸暖

這首“當冬夜漸暖”在MV首播的那一天苦苦在電腦前等了很久。怎麼Youtube還不努力點啊，加油呢。等到的時候興奮得不得了。因為我很愛這首歌：）一天要聽幾十次。

這首歌很有“我懷念的”那種感覺。頭兩句讓我感觸很深，因為很多時候很多傷心只有自己明白，說出來了結果還是要自己去承擔解決。有人說，傷心不必說給人家聽，因為別人不是你，他不會明白。也許就是這種感覺吧.

還沒買到她的新專輯。昨天終於在Speedy看到了，興奮得吃不下飯，心裡總是盤旋著要怎樣把它弄到手。決定再等多幾天，也許Popular很快就會有了，那我也可以買折扣價：）祈禱啊，我好想要那個膠帶或者海報一張啊！！

如果你懂我，你會知道我是一個很害怕失去的人。

很多事情　不是誰說了就算
即使傷心　結果還是自己擔
多少次失望表示著多少次期盼
事實證明　幸福很難

我們之間　不是誰說了就算
拉扯的愛　徒增結局的難堪
一百次相愛只要有一次的絢爛
下一次　會更勇敢

當冬夜漸暖　當大海也不再那麼藍
當月色的純白變得陰暗
那只是代表快樂不再那麼簡單

當冬夜漸暖　當夏夜的樹上不再有蟬
當回憶老去的痕跡斑斑
那只是因為悲傷從來　都不會有答案

我們之間　不是誰說了就算
拉扯的愛　徒增結局的難堪
一百次相愛只要有一次的絢爛
下一次　會更勇敢

當冬夜漸暖　當大海也不再那麼藍
當月色的純白變得陰暗
那只是代表快樂不再那麼簡單

當冬夜漸暖　當夏夜的樹上不再有蟬
當回憶老去的痕跡斑斑
那只是因為悲傷從來　都不會有答案

當冬夜漸暖　當青春也都煙消雲散
當美麗的故事都有遺憾
那只是習慣把愛當作喜歡
重要的是　我們如何愛過那一段

有種心情叫莫名其妙。

今天的心情是起伏不定。
早上依時起身看到手機有三封未讀信息-今天不用去實習,老師請病假所以要回學校。
真好啊,不用去罰站流汗!但我有點睡不下,也只好在床上翻來覆去...

家裡剩下三個人,但我很孤單。
想想去找一個人的畹婷也許會比較好一點,至少嘴巴有開著說話不會臭。心情的確是有好了一點,但還是很失落。
原本是想著如果其他人都還有在,可能會比較不孤單。但事實是怎樣我也不知道,我不想冷靜地去想...

到了學校,九個人扣掉一個xx,熱鬧了一點。
但還是很孤單。我知道自己很少會被記得,不過還有點習慣所以會給自己很多事情做不去難過。也許沒有人喜歡和愁著臉的人做朋友吧。
前前後後聊了天,嘴巴碎碎念咒罵著老師,心情更加不好。
一個人坐在牆角整理我的賬目,本來想要抄寫我的佛經讓我心情可以平穩,什麼都不去想。好吧,有個又矮又醜不拉嘰的又要我們練習procedure。還要說我穿膝上以上的短褲(明明就不是),忍不住口氣很不好說了幾句。

放學後一個人拿著手機上網,喝了一杯咖啡,等著可以出去走走好放鬆心情。
出去走走心情的確好了很多,我逃離了我心裡的地獄,暫時性的。最近沒有買什麼東西,把錢都花在吃上面也許比較對得起肚子和心情。也算是解壓的一種吧。短短的3個小時,我比較快樂了一點,至少我想要改善的關係有了改變。

回到家,嗯好開心大家都還沒睡。
今天也沒有什麼看到咏薇和愛麗絲。因為實習,這幾個星期也沒有講到什麼話。
因為實習,每個人的人際關係都有好大的變化,我是說好的。班上的每個人的互動都比較親近了。只是為什麼我還是覺得只有我沒有什麼變化...我遇到的還是一樣的朋友,我不知道我應該要相信誰。
咏薇說她在等我回來,因為不敢一個人睡覺。也好吧,至少我還有被需要..有人會因為我而變得勇敢...

我知道你看不懂，也許像流水帳。
沒關係,因為我也我不知道忽然在難過些什麼...
只是想要把今天的心情記錄下來,寫了,然後就忘記。所以我很少讀回自己寫過的文字...

老了病了。

最近在政府醫院實習,日子過得很辛苦。抱怨的話說得那麼多也沒有意思了,因為抱怨也解決不了我們的苦難。今天想說的是別的。

39/女,瘦骨如柴的子宮頸癌病人。癌細胞蔓延至骨頭,實在很嚴重。身上有數不清的管子和一堆等著被折磨的日子。癌症有多可怕我相信大家都明白有多可怕。因為她,敲醒了我很多值得去深思的地方。

生病真的很可怕。說真的我不想要生命。生老然後就死對我身邊的人不是會比較好嗎?我不想看著我40歲躺在病床上,然後包著成人尿片,插著無數的沒有延續我生命素質的管子,還有最難過的是要我媽媽一直照顧我。我寧願在睡夢中去了,還是給我1ml的kcl讓我結束生命。我是說萬一我未婚。

說到未婚。maisa說她想要有一個可以陪她一起到老的伴侶,至少生病的時候不孤單還有人照料。經她這麼一說,我有點被動搖了。一直以來我很堅守我不想要踏上婚姻這條路,因為我很清楚了解自己的性格。不是不相信愛情,只是和我在一起的人必須要有過人的能耐和意志來接受我的脾氣。我不想再去傷害愛我的人,也不想因為自己的緣故要讓原本深愛自己的人離開,我承受不了。也許對於這些問題我擔心得太早了。

然而,這幾個星期在兒童病房和婦科實習,每次看到嬰兒的臉,母親臉上的滿足還有病了卻沒人來看的病人。我害怕了。我怕我病了沒有人來看我,陪我說話支持我。就算有,他會一直都在嗎?我一直以為一個人生活沒有什麼了不起...直到剛才一個人和風扇搏鬥,我不就只是一個弱小女子,連修一個風扇也要孤軍奮鬥。身邊沒有一個幫我換燈泡還是蓋被子的雙手和失意時可以靠的肩膀我,我還會過得好嗎...

好吧,別說我了。爸爸媽媽也會有老去需要住院的一天。我好怕我沒有那麼好的經濟能力讓他們住好的醫院,接受好的醫療服務,過得比較好一點。我多麼希望自己是可以有錢到不用去上班,在他們身邊照顧他們,就好像我曾經也多麼需要他們...我有公公婆婆,外公外婆,我很明白當你老了身邊沒有人可以照顧你的那種心酸...我不想父母老了還要像球一樣被跑來丟去,沒有人願意負責任..不知道可不可以不要再長大,我不想爸爸媽媽變老...

我不知道未來會不會有一個人這樣陪著我...